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I Resolve

Dear Diary,

2020 is here and just the cadence of it, twenty twenty, sounds momentous, doesn’t it? I better do something…

Actually, I spent quite a bit of time in 2019 trying to be comfortable being unmomentous. Is that a word? Judging by the red line on my screen, it is not. In other words, just being. There are large segments of my life when I was shooting for the stars hoping to at least hit the moon,

investing time and money into huge motivational seminars held in arenas and coliseums for a weekend surrounded five to twenty (there’s that word again) thousand peeps dying to unlock the secret and get born again into the richer fuller life just on the other side of the fence. Going, going, going and doing, doing, doing.

I resolve to be present on this side of the fence.

If I could only crack the code… There’s nothing quite like being driven night and day to achieve stupendous goals (like winning the Pulitzer (or any) Prize for Photography) and earn the respect of my peers and family even though I drive them bananas and risk losing the relationships in the process.

I resolve to protect my relationships.

Last year I focused on “doing work that matters for people who care”, credit Seth Goden and his book This Is Marketing, and for me, it was an evolutionary breakthrough.

I love Seth’s philosophy. Serve the minimum viable audience. My work is not for everybody. It’s possible I could live very well with 1000 true fans. I highly recommend the read.

There were moments where there was plenty I could do, but none of it work that mattered. That is when I had to quiet the noise in my head that was lying to me saying that I need to keep pushing because I wasn’t good enough or had arrived yet, and just “be”. After all we are human beings, not human doings.

Don’t get me wrong. I have a plan and work it. I’m talking about after the work is done and the results are or are not in, that I give myself permission to cease doing and let my body and mind recover and heal and simply enjoy time being. For me, that is when I get the next inspiration from God or the universe. When I shut of the “lizard brain”, calm my heart and fill my lungs to capacity, that’s when I connect to life.

I resolve to practice being a human being.

Finally, I resolve to wrap up this blog with a couple more resolutions.

I resolve to write more.

I resolve to make better art.

I resolve to “be” all that I can be.